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dreaming of the sun

Middle Class Self-Indulgent Mommies

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 3 septembre 2013

Achat vérifié

Each of us bring to the books we read our own perspectives or backgrounds. For me I bring to the books I read a background of being a working class kid who grew up and was lucky enough to get a first-class education and obtain a handful of degrees. But I also bring with me a feminist heart and a researchers mind AND I'm married to a Frenchman.
I tell you this because I expected that I would love this book.
I didn't.
This book disturbed me on so many levels. I finished it but it was hard going because it was just a bunch of self-indulgent women complaining about their lives and refusing to do anything about it. The women who had chances, women who had husbands who were willing to help out with childcare, who had husbands who were willing to stay home, didn't let their husbands because they "could do it better".
My French husband heard a saying on an American show awhile back that he loves. I kept thinking of it while reading this book-"First world problems."
That's exactly what this book is.
This book talks about middle and upper middle class women (and a few working class women) who are working on achieving "the dream" of having it all and finding that they can't.
What about the millions of American working class women who don't have a choice? What about them? I know many who "have it all" because they have no choice. They have to work full-time while raising kids because their income is all they have. What about the working class women (many I have personally met over the years at Universities across America) who work full-time, raise kids AND go to school so that they can better their lives and that of their children?
This book is a self-indulgent rant by middle class women of how they want to be strong and in-control but then when they get the career that they want they suddenly think it's too hard and they just want to stay home and raise their kids.
The women in the book want equality (or so they say because I don't believe them) but they HAVE to marry men who make more money than they do and then they throw away careers to stay home.
Coming from my family background with a mother who worked full-time and took care of me (all by herself), while I went to daycare and school, a mother who worked overtime every single Saturday of my childhood because we needed the money these women are a disgrace to the women's movement and women everywhere.
I have traveled to a lot of countries in my studies and work, I have met with and worked with women from every walk of life, their struggles and what they do everyday without complaint or without asking for pity is amazing. They are the ones that books should be written about, not these selfish mommies.

We need to get rid of the perfect mom role (the honestly equal women in this world don't care about being a perfect mother, they just want to raise happy kids)and we need to get rid of all of these "rules" and let go and live our lives.
No one can tell you what you can or cannot have.
At the end of it all it seemed that these women wanted was more and more money. They had to have the high-powered careers because that was the only marker of a successful life-money. They had to have husbands who had the same kind of jobs, who made more money.
You are the one who lets others expectations control you. Stop listening and in the end you'll be happy.

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