Amazon.fr :Commentaires en ligne: Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

Identifiez-vous pour filtrer les commentaires

Filtré par

5 étoilesEffacer un filtre

520 évaluations au total, 164 avec avis

Un problème s'est produit lors du filtrage des commentaires. Veuillez réessayer ultérieurement.

Traduire tous les commentaires en français

Depuis France

Bazinga

Une réflexion très interessante

Commenté en France 🇫🇷 le 11 juillet 2018

Achat vérifié

Livre très intéressant, rédigé dans un anglais courant

Utile

D’autres pays

Vic

Will you enjoy reading it

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 6 août 2016

Achat vérifié

For adults who really want to be honest with teens about sexuality, this is the books we’ve been waiting for. For teens--guys as well as girls--who are having trouble navigating teen sexual culture, this is the book you’ve been waiting for.

Will you enjoy reading it? Honestly, it made liberal-hearted me a bit squeamish as it covered all the bases: hook-up culture in both high school and college, including the demand on girls that they give guys whom they don’t even know blow jobs (because the current generation of teens has a mantra that this isn’t real sex)--and the need for these girls to get pretty drunk in order to allow themselves to think this was OK/normal; the culture of ‘purity pledges’ that has come as a backlash (and the research that shows that the purity pledges don’t work/that teens who take them are more likely to get pregnant than those who don’t); date rape; rape on college campuses; binge drinking and rape; sexist images and stereotyping of female bodies; pornography that degrades and objectifies women as one of the only sex education tools that teens use because they are getting ‘abstinence only’ education at school; the negative to disastrous sexual encounters that result from ‘porn-ed’ and’ abstinence-only-ed’ (painful, humiliating sexual encounters modeled after porn and tens of millions of dollars of taxpayer money poured into abstinence with virtually no resulting decline in teen sex); the bizarre and very public tightrope walk girls must take between frigid prude and social-media-shamed slut.

Yes, the issues are so vast and numerous, it makes you spin. While there is discussion in the book of LGBTQIA issues (and interviews of lesbians girls), the book is largely about cisgender teens, about how girls and boys see themselves relating to one another sexually; about discomfort in challenging norms and about how to be assertive in taking back authority for one’s own body and one’s own pleasure.

Orenstein navigates the charged environment of high school and college sexual practices by interviewing over 70 girls about their experiences; she attends purity balls; she attends abstinence-only sex ed classes and classes where the discussion of sexuality is much more frank and without any judgment. Her research is eye-opening. By the time she arrives at her final chapter, which includes some suggestions for supporting girls and young women to be assertive about their sexual needs, even the faint-hearted will be agreeing with her. As she discusses the much more open and frank education that teens in Holland are given, we wish for the same for our own children. Yes, the conversations are difficult, even embarrassing for some adults (who had their own very lousy sex education as teens--so this is not a blame game). But when teens--boys and girls--are told the truth about their desires and then encouraged not to subvert them into a hook-up culture, but to form loving, respectful partnerships, everyone benefits. As it now stands--and as Girls and Sex makes very clear--the sexual culture for girls is one where girls are coerced into giving sexual pleasure to boys (often by somehow ‘owing’ oral sex to boys because they ended up at the same party) without getting any sort of sexual pleasure in return. So, uncomfortable as it is to discuss, the sexual pleasure of girls must be addressed.

Orenstein summarizes very well in her final paragraph:

“I want sexuality to be a source of self-knowledge and creativity and communication despite its potential risks. I want them to revel in their bodies’ sensuality without being reduced to it. . . . I want them to be safe from disease, unwanted pregnancy, cruelty, dehumanization, and violence. If they are assaulted, I want them to have recourse from their school administrators, employers, the courts. . . . We’ve raised a generation of girls to have a voice, to expect egalitarian treatment in the home, in the classroom, in the workplace. Now it’s time to demand that ‘intimate justice’ in their personal lives as well.”

High school housekeeping: While this is an adult book--and a very frank one--the discussions with the interviewees are about real life in high school and on college campuses. It would be sad to force you to navigate this craziness alone--but that’s what adults are doing when they hide the frank conversation and the possible solutions from you. So--I recommend that all high school students read this. Yes, boys, you need to read it, too. It will help you to understand why having sex with a passed-out girl (or boy,as in one case in the book) is rape. And it will help those of you who would never consider such a thing to understand how to talk to girls about what they want and need. So, yes, read it.

(Note: This review is mirrored on my blog "School Library Lady.")

15 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

E. N. Anderson

Possibly even worse is that love and care seem almost to have ...

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 20 avril 2016

Achat vérifié

As a grandfather, totally out of touch with the world of girls today, I read this book to find out what sort of world my three granddaughters are getting themselves into. It's a nightmare world. 10% of girls get violently raped, 25% get taken advantage of while drunk. Possibly even worse is that love and care seem almost to have disappeared as concepts. Sex is mostly about "hooking up." I trust my grandkids and their wonderful parents to manage this wilderness somehow, but I have some major questions for society. First, I certainly agree with the author that the most immediate and important thing is to give girls more control of their lives and feelings. The awful old pressures to conform, go along, do what boys/men want, and be passive and docile appear to be actually worse than in the 1950s when I was this age. They certainly aren't any better. Second, I also agree that one very important thing is to teach girls how to do sex right--to make it safe, enjoyable, and emotionally satisfying--which it apparently almost never is, today. We in the 1950s were utterly unprepared for sex and didn't have a clue how to enjoy it when we finally managed--it was supposed to be "fun," that was all. Apparently things are actually even worse now: the kids learn from porn, which is truly worse than nothing, for reasons covered with great explicitness in this book. Third, and this is not really stressed enough in the book, we have to do something about pop culture and the pressures on kids to conform to it and take all their standards and orientations from it. It is teaching the worst possible lessons--and not just the porn. Fourth, we have to stop glorifying the most unnatural: totally shaved bodies, plastic surgery, all sorts of piercings and so on, anything to make the body look like a pathology textbook rather than a human being. How is a girl going to have a decent love life if she thinks her body is so repulsive that she has to do all these things to it? Some pretty graphic details of hating nature are in the book (I spare the reader here).
A lot of girls are simply swearing off sex. University surveys known to me have revealed figures in the range of 20 minutes a day for "romantic activities." (Versus 7 to 8 hours for classes and studies.) So it seems like the alternative to partying is nothing, or nearly nothing. I hope this is wrong....
We as a society really have to go against the pop trash, whether it's porn, gangsta rap, other pop music, or the other horrors these days, and get the message to the kids (boys as well as girls) that sex is about love and relationships, AND can be a lot of fun, but it can't be done by conformity, least of all with porn--it has to be developed as an art in itself.

402 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

Gene P

Fifty Shades of Envy

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 14 mai 2016

Achat vérifié

In the first half of the book the author confirms that 70% of today’s girls (13 – 19 years old) are “sluts” who can outdrink, outcuss, and outfornicate most adult males, yet they do not get the physical satisfaction that boys get. So boys must stop looking at girls objectively, evaluating their external female parts, and learn more about stimulating their penis-equivalent internal part. In the second half of the book she claims that, even though girls outnumber boys in college, 25% of them get raped by boys, and the rest of them don’t remember. Girls are entitled to call “rape” at any time, even years later, and it’s up to boys to prove conclusively that the girl did not say “no”, even if she insists on a condom. Proving a negative isn’t easy.
If liberals knew anything about science, other than global warming, or religion, other than paganism, they might not try to fill the void with fictional delusions which they try to impose on society. They don’t see the biological, genetic, or anthropological basis for gender, or race, thinking they are merely “social constructs”, easily manipulated. The biological fact that males produce a quadrillion sperm cells during a lifetime, while females dispense one egg a month for a little more than 30 years, might account for inherent differences in behavior. The Christian belief that Eve gave up her soul for the hoax of empowerment, making Adam take the first bite, might also provide some insight into human behavior. The author’s belief that the clitoris is equal to the penis is a little like comparing the female mammary to the male nipple. The author spends time describing female parts in detail because they are objectified by boys (and girls), but she never gives her 70 sample girls the opportunity to objectify male parts by expressing preferences.
Overall, it’s as much fun to read as Harry Potter, Twilight, or Hunger Games

Une personne a trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

Lukas Eddy

Eye-Opening Work

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 12 novembre 2020

Achat vérifié

Every young person should read this book.
If you're a girl, this book will help you understand yourself and protect yourself.
If you're a guy, this book will both help you to be a gentleman and find a high-quality girl.

I've not seen many works that go so deep into the millenial female's mind on sex and dating. If you want to better understand the strengths, weaknesses, flaws and problems how our generation approaches sex, this book is a must read.

One of the critical findings in this book is that women often seek to please a man, to at times great discomfort, without expecting anything in return. There is a lack of reciprocity in so many 'casual encounters'. Why? The answer is not so straightforward, nor, I would conclude, well understood.

There are many other critical findings, and questions raised. Having lived both in the US and abroad, I am painfully aware at the deficiencies in our sex ed programs that contribute to the US having some of the highest accidental pregnancy and STI rates in the developed world. Now I know why.

Again: every sexually active person under 35, or any parent, in any western nation, should read this book. The knowledge is too valuable too ignore.

Une personne a trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

djb

A Must Read

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 30 mai 2016

Achat vérifié

A game changing, must-read for parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and anyone who has relationships with young people navigating today's world of sex. Teens and young adults are facing a new uncharted world with regards to sex - a world which is dominated by the internet and its emphasis on texting, and selfies, and the fantasies driven by online porn and the Kardashians. On some level, all of the sexual liberation which arrived in the sixties, which helped women to become supposed sexual equals to men can now work against today's young women. I acknowledge that some of the stories may be anecdotal, and Orenstein does, too. Unfortunately my experience in the workplace and amongst my friends, is that the stories are the tip of the iceberg for many young women. And let's remember - meaningless and degrading sex is bad for both men and women.

In addition to exploring the real issues that face our teens and young adults, Orenstein offers example of meaningful alternatives to the post sixties style of parenting. She examines parenting styles in Norway, where in addition to open discussions about the mechanics of sex, parents are providing real guidance to achieving a healthy and mature approach to the emotional aspects of sexuality.

In our effort to be good parents, we are standing side by side with our kids on education, and in all of the arenas that help them to maximize their potential. Unfortunately, we sometimes abandon them at the door of their burgeoning sexuality as they head off to college. We tacitly approve of pre-marital sex, and provide education on birth control in hopes that they will evolve into mature adults who enjoy sex. Orenstein is helping us to understand that just as we drove them to soccer and dance lessons, they need coaching and guidance to move from puberty to emotionally fulfilled sexual beings. The process to achieve maturity with regards to sexuality needs to be discussed openly, and with the same dedication we provided to college applications and prom dresses.

42 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

Grace Abbey

empowering

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 29 octobre 2022

Achat vérifié

if you feel like you like your voice matters and learn to express yourself

Traduire les commentaires en Français

Leah Hayes

This book is a MUST READ!

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 8 mai 2021

Achat vérifié

Peggy Orenstein’s book Girls & Sex was one of the most relatable books I have ever read. With that being said I would recommend this book to young girls and even their parents, not only should the girls be educated on the concepts from this book, but the parents should be too. The parents need to understand the culture that young girls are now growing up in and how not discussing sex with them can hinder them in the long run. The book has many valuable ideas in it but the biggest one to me was her discussion on rape and consent. Orenstein really brings to light what girls have gone through in their sexual experiences and that is just out of the girls she interviewed imagine how many girls have had a bad sexual experience especially rape. This book really just gets you thinking, and I definitely recommend it.

Une personne a trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

Lori Day

I expected this book to be fantastic, and it did not disappoint!

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 31 mars 2016

Achat vérifié

Having been a fan of Peggy Orenstein's writing for many years, I expected this book to be fantastic, and it did not disappoint. As the mother of a young adult daughter, I know how tricky these conversations can be, but I also know that to avoid them is to leave girls to navigate our pornified culture alone. Orenstein has been writing about girls for over 20 years, and has built a trusting audience that is ready to embrace a book that might otherwise be seen as third-rail. In Girls & Sex, she reveals the inner lives of girls and young women who are trying to figure out how to have the same agency in their sex lives as they have in school, work, and other aspects of their lives. It was the quotes from the girls themselves that I found most riveting and that have stuck with me. The landscape is indeed complicated, but this book untangles a lot of those complexities and lays bare the painful and confusing layers of decisions today's girls must make about their own sexuality. I can't say that I turned the last page and felt that everything will now be sunshine and rainbows. We do have a lot of work to do. But I felt that with Peggy Orenstein's guidance, parents will have a much better understanding of their daughters' worlds, and some key tools to communicate with them while they are young and throughout their lives as women. I hope young women (and young men!) will read it as well. I can't recommend this book highly enough!

Une personne a trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

Rick Boling

Long Overdue

Commenté aux États-Unis 🇺🇸 le 11 avril 2016

Achat vérifié

An excellent book that is not only intriguing and well written, but long-overdue. Having been somewhat of a serial offender during my teens, I am vividly aware of the incredible lack of clear, uncensored sexual information young girls and boys have had to rely on over the years, not to mention the vast amount of potentially damaging misinformation they often base their sexual encounters on. As teenagers growing up in the late ’50s and early ‘60s, about all we boys had in the way of sex education was a sexual grapevine loaded with inaccuracies, myths, and ridiculous ego challenges. All of which served to not only exploit and degrade our female counterparts, but had the potential to cause serious and long-lasting emotional damage as well. Today, that grapevine appears to have been replaced or supplemented by a huge supply of Internet porn that attracts the attention of boys and girls alike. Although there is a good bit of sensible and frank sexual instruction to be found on the Web, it is easier (and more enticing) for a teenager to type a few four-letter words into a search engine and watch a video than it is to do a comprehensive search for legitimate, factual information. We should all hope that this book will find a large audience among today's adolescents and preteens, both male and female, thereby setting the stage for future generations to better understand the physical intricacies and emotional nuances of their early sexual encounters.

5 personnes ont trouvé cela utile

Traduire les commentaires en Français

Avez-vous besoin du service clients? Cliquez ici

‹ Voir tous les détails sur Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

Informations sur les commentaires et leur contrôle

5 étoiles		76%
4 étoiles		14%
3 étoiles		6%
2 étoiles		1%
1 étoile		3%

Amazon Music Écoutez des millions de chansons	AbeBooks Livres, art & articles de collection	Amazon Web Services Services de Cloud Computing Flexibles	Audible Livres audio télécharger	Book Depository Livres expédiés dans le monde entier

Kindle Direct Publishing Auto-publiez facilement vos livres au format numérique	Offres Reconditionnées Bonnes affaires	Shopbop Vêtements de Marque & Mode	Amazon Advertising Ciblez, attirez et fidélisez vos clients	Amazon Business Paiement 30 jours. Hors TVA. Pour les professionnels.

Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

›

Commentaires client

Commentaires client

Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

Filtré par

Un problème s'est produit lors du filtrage des commentaires. Veuillez réessayer ultérieurement.

Depuis France

Un problème s'est produit lors du chargement des commentaires. Veuillez réessayer ultérieurement.

D’autres pays

Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape › Commentaires client

Commentaires client

Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

Filtré par

Un problème s'est produit lors du filtrage des commentaires. Veuillez réessayer ultérieurement.

Depuis France

Un problème s'est produit lors du chargement des commentaires. Veuillez réessayer ultérieurement.

D’autres pays

Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

›

Commentaires client